Going By Formula

You know most big businesses has the view of common people mirroring the way us normal people look at roaches. One of the things they hate is how everything can go cold so quickly without knowing why things do so. Well, from my little rocking chair I will impart you the knowledge that we have learned only for thousands of years, so if you are looking at all the small factors trying to find it let me drop the 4-1-1 on you.

Something special about people is that when you lie to them, they don’t like you. I know! It is amazing to know that people will trust you as far as can be thrown, and it will never kill your business, but it will definitely shave some time off windows to make your money. A couple mistakes and another business goes out, could be yours, and another takes its place, could be mine. That would only be some of you dyed in the wool business types worst nightmares.

It is a bit of a theme as of late. I like watching massive botches because it gives me hope that I can do better when I have to do it for my own business or my own plans. Formulas help with a lot of things, I used to cook so I know a few of them, but after a certain point, you have to swing for the fences and see what happens. We can all see the differences that is one of my greatest abilities. Now, I could just rip them apart on this, and I will when it is really bad, but what about the regular moments of idiocy? Well, let’s just say I will be a devil’s advocate of sorts. So, if you like the sort of thing well, you should stay in store to this blog.

Oh, How Sad Things Have Gotten

I was actually in a good mood for a moment. I think it was about thirty-seven seconds. Thirty-seven seconds is the exact amount of time for me to roll out of bed, try to stand, pop my back, move three steps, take my medicine, and sit in my chair.

Seeing there was an attack in London and already in my mind, I know what the next few actions will be. People will lie trying to make others feel better, others will give sympathy being too far away or too strapped for supplies to do anything, others will forget the day after and I will sit here knowing that some people will not be coming home.

It may be strange for so many to be sad for so long. We have normalized such tragedy as easily as the coffee being out at our work. I mean it is a horrible thing, but really the biggest knife in my craw is that it will be ultimately fruitless save for people who want to use it as something of a resume builder. People as weapons like that bother me. They truly do.

People are both the greatest and the worst weapons of time. We can build mountains, stop diseases, promote other species lives, and show our greatest bits not for awards or adulation, but for just because they need to be there. We can stand together and do great big things or as single people stand against everything wrong, but we don’t. Goodness knows that this world can be so much more than we are now except to wake up time after time to see that we are destroying each other really for what? The books we read? The colors we parade in our special moments?

There is a lot of good people, my Facebook is full of them. So when I hear about jobs with more power not being able to find one it drives me up the wall. Sometimes to do something well you just need some experience, a wild hair, schooling, or just one of the three. In fact, this whole thing where some people can’t take jobs because of stupid requirements made me think of a set of videos I think people will like. Whether some or not soon I will play Devil’s Advocate to a way of thinking that people can do more than ever expected. Despite all the good, there are also a group, a group of people where you must hyper-specialize in things that may not actually be needed. There is also a group of people who are afraid of work, but love having power or titles and since those people seem to be the biggest problems.

Oh, I noticed you, the kind that would rather have someone do something else when it is so simple to do yourself. Guess what, I want you to take those titles, those jobs, those championships and I want you to hug them close, I want you to cuddle them at night. I want you to enjoy every moment you have them because your practices will soon show cracks in your defense. You will not see it coming one day and soon you will be at the bottom again. Keep everything warm. Maybe, keep those music contracts safe because I know bands that will be great enough to claim them. I know cooks who can run circles around all network chefs, hell even I could still and I can’t feel half of my fingers. Artists who truly deserve the eye of people while so many find the rise of mediocrity like a coming messiah. Finally, I know businessman barely starting that will hold so much that really it is funny when others cast them aside. I can see that talent, and that talent is getting a little restless, so keep those accolades clutched to your chests, because you will wake up to find they have been pulled from you, and maybe you should have tried to keep up.

No Space Is Safe

*Reads the article*

(Is this going to be the nice guy, or the jaded prick writing today…)

So, there is this thing called safe spaces in some colleges where people can go away if they don’t like what is being said to decompress and withdraw themselves fro m conversation that may be insulting or hurtful. Sounds good on paper, but really it makes me think that massive groups of people have lost their balls, figuratively and literally.

(Well, that answers that.)

Before we go in to possibly inflammatory opinions let me find someone who can say it better than me.

I could just point at this a thousand times, and put up a picture of the largest middle finger on earth for those who do not get the point. I even have one fresh from use with a friend who needed it hence the shading.

I could say how people just need to find their balls and make some “Lost balls. give if found” and some snappy comeback because the internet likes that shit. The internet has become so toxic that politicians twitter fuck-ups are like a, a fresh mountain stream in comparison. So what is the point of all this, well the point is that seriously the need to even talk about this shows we may have just failed as humanity. I was going to end this here. I was getting ready to finish my tomato soup and let the whole thing go. It had been a long week of dealing with idiots and quick trigger morons, social justice warriors and I just wanted it all to end, so I could dream of a life that is better like dancing with aliens or go just relaxing on a boat but seriously #BoycottHawaii?

So someone makes a statement you like and you suddenly have to boycott them. Let me make this absolutely crystal fucking clear.There are opinions that, believe it or not, do not match with yours, and they never will for various reasons. What you do is one of two things. First, you can try to be intelligent and look at their opinion and what they say in an overall encompassing view before gauging the merits and problems of it. The other side and this is the really easy one, you go fuck off. Fuck off. Fuck miles of off or fuck centimeters of off just go F off. Do it far enough that no one can hear you like space or the inside of a volcano, which Hawaii has plenty of and I am sure raising the IQ of the country a couple points is a job they will be happy to take because it does not help, but some people I guess are just beyond helping. For those who are just a bit dim to connect the dots of these statements if you are truly that stupid and cannot see how looking at others opinions can help anything just go throw yourself in a volcano, in Hawaii.

Since everyone is boycotting everything here are a couple things I thought we could boycott so we can actually do something with this much energy. We could boycott the horrible VA treatment, the lack of funds in our education system, we could boycott news channels that falsify facts for ratings, we could do it on lower gas prices, lower food costs, better farm treatment, or even a better fucking toaster. We got a hashtag about boycotting a state because what someone from the state said something that someone else did not like? Oh, the absolute horror! Why it is as scary as Dracula and half as bloody, but you know what there most like is going to be someone from the state who doesn’t like me and I am not going to see any#BoycottOneGuyInPortland tag, and really in all honestly if I did I would think that part of my life’s work is complete. So, I guess I should really just deal with it and the rest of these pinheads should too.


Idiots, Drugs, and Mech Metaphors

Ok, most people who are reading this for some happy fuzzy thing may want to leave now.

It is your funeral otherwise.

So living another day I would like to tell you something. I am not a person. I am not a human. I am a bunch of little tiny chibi drawn characters piloting me like Power Rangers Mech. It sounds odd, but really that is how I can go from breaking punching bags in gyms, while talking about women’s fashion for the middle class in the millennium and simultaneously think about where my card game is going to be printed up. Being that split on the action, conversation, and thought happen more times than it really should but life ain’t easy and you all know that.

Staying in the struggling mech metaphor there is the nice one and that is the one that most people usually project, nothing new there. Except when I look at enough stupidity in a short period of time that little nice goody two shoe portion of my personality has to turn the wheel over. They turn the wheel over to the little character that well, would really be best described as a jaded prick.

Looking at events not only around the world but locally has made me realize that the portion of people who know or who can educate themselves to at least grasp what is going on partially is inverted to the people that can make most of the decisions. I am not even talking the hard ones, I am in fact referencing the ones where we all stand around a turd and go…

“Yup, that’s shit.”

The first person who looks at a situation and tries to spin it in such way they sound like they have just gotten off a bender with Charlie Sheen with no evidence to their argument or even so much as a thought I think should, well, they should go back to their drugs. It is clear that they have a hookup, and really I would most likely ask them how I could be so lost from reality. In times like these, I think if these people really want to try and act like adults they have to share the wealth so to speak.

I mean our country is in a place I cannot even believe, built of years upon years of howling monkeys that we have put in place because we can’t get anyone who has a grasp on reality to take the job. Sure the pay is great and the health care is dandy, but most people I know would listen to some of these things across the board and just rethink the whole drinking while working thing. There is not a single party to takes the blame because especially the two main ones should look at their efforts over the last presidential election cycle and just wonder who drank the bleach.

We have one party who put someone after they had already been proven of cheating, media chicanery, lying about funds, ethics, and who was so cocky that they seemed pleased with every misstep that they made. Then on the other side, we have Donald Trump, and the jaded prick steering my little body forward is banging his head into the steering wheel now because these two really could be the same person if you look at a funhouse mirror. Yes, I did say I would keep this blog political free, but I really don’t think it is political when you look at it and go…

“Yup, it’s shit.”

I actually tried starting a party. One that would deal with a lot of the issues that is currently plaguing this country and tried to bring in a lot of younger blood to help push it too which we were stopped by people in reputable parties whether they are state or national making it even more difficult on an already herculean task.  Now, I see groups who use protest like it is their personal privilege to act like brats who didn’t get a nap. People who want to scream and cry, but have no plan to make it better thinking it will be handed to them. There are people currently crying over every small thing who legitimately believe because their feelings are hurt that life should change to accompany them.

It can’t be this generation’s fault as we are living longer we are doing in a lower quality of life than before. It can’t be a race’s fault just because they do not know another race’s context and battles magically plucking the knowledge out of the air like a magician. It isn’t a religion or a belief systems fault because in every religion around the world you can boil a hearty portion down to “Don’t be a dick.” yet people arm themselves with every snippet about annihilation and destroying your foes with the wrath of the almighty deity of choice or belief.

Then I watch after people tell me it is a race or a generation fall on their face every time because they can’t see the forest for the trees and realize that everything is on fire. We have the biggest debt in U.S history and we didn’t as a country have the spark of thought that maybe we should put some money where it counts instead putting them in places it doesn’t. Social Security is fucked right now, and the education system is so bad I would rather teach kids, because I know at least I can give them something better than what they are getting from the public systems despite the best efforts of a group of teachers whose souls have not died from feeling so useless. I don’t even like kids, but the testing and testing and stupid rules and do not get me even started about the school lunch program, and what the government defines as healthy school lunches because after a bunch of them had a serious conversation about Ketchup being a vegetable to pat themselves on the back made me want to knee each of those suckers straight in the junk hard enough that any chance they had of children would be gone and any kids already there would be retroactively written from existence.

You want to fix this shit, it’s easy. Put in better people. I can literally piss from my apartment roof on to someone and the odds are in favor they would be a better choice than people who have done this ten to twenty years.

I will make this world better. Hopefully, you got a laugh at my rantings. I just get so mad because it seems like the best efforts of those including myself and a lot of people better than me are being wasted for such frivolity that makes one wonder that maybe there is no hope and that we should just roll up get some lawn chairs and watch the shit show with a preferred beverage. Let me end with this, knowing how completely off we are on some things how can we expect someone to fix it if we do not even try it ourselves?

Social justice and Micro Transgressions

A long time ago I got into a fight. A fight where a couple people representing a gang wanted to take the money of me and my friend. The lights were painting everything a sickly orange and I just lost my cool because for the umpteenth time someone thought that because they were part of a gang or a group or a clique or had more money or something else that they were better than me.

I am not better than anyone, and no one is better than me. It has taken countless pints of spilled blood, dozens of scars, a handful of broken teeth, and another of broken bones to learn that because moment to moment we only have we are in that moment. All we have one way or the other is defined in a single moment, and that is it.

Back to the street me and my friend took a fair beating, but that was when we learned that was their best shot. They figured it out about three seconds after us and tried pulling out some little switches. It may be a bad snapshot of me at the moment, but it was then that I felt free to do whatever I want because without a weapon I had to defend myself. Our opponents wouldn’t want to be heading back saying the got beat AFTER they pulled their blades. It just does not stand well in the grand scheme when you are always worried about looking weak.

I took a small nick next to my hairline, and if you squint you can still see where it started on the right side. Those blades never got another chance to do damage to us. It felt like hours when it really was minutes, but every second counted to them because every drop of blood they had let to the air I made sure to get out of them. One guy had a busted nose and jaw and to this day will not be in the same building as me, and he still has a limp to the left.

I bring this up because this was in an area that people would go out and bleed for what they wanted, for what they believed. I bled buckets and to see anything after wearing a crimson mask is difficult for the experienced and impossible for the first timer. Hearing the small things people get up in arms over micro transgressions or trying to enforce a backwards policy or deem something discriminatory without any evidence makes me sad. Those gangbangers and me and my friend fought and bled and it wasn’t unheard of for a kid in the grade to die to a botched drug deal or a meth house explosion or just because a fight went too far. Nearly a decade off and on over and over of fighting for what you think is right.

When I read things like how grammar, as it stands, is racist because according to the university, everything is racist which I disagree with wholeheartedly, but that is not the point of this writing. Those guys fought and bled and scratched and pulled every trick in the book, and those girls did the same to survive. I respect those people who had to fight a thousand times, no a million times more than the overly sensitive group of people that is making so much noise it should be a crime in itself. These criers only want something for them, they don’t care about anyone else as long as it proves their own case a little easier. The world is not perfect, not even close. I would rather take the time and look at a situation and gauge the evidence to actually help those who found themselves working against an unfairly stacked deck. Most of those people I beat down and beat the crap out of me. Well, they would too.

I wonder where all of this negative energy will fester in the world because eventually, it will set something alight that cannon be extinguished. Now that my venting is over, however, I am going to try and make the world the better place it can be, and hope I am good enough to do it.

Bad Blood

My family has what could be called a strained relationship. Just recently things took a pretty bad turn of events thanks to one person, and that would be my sister. If one has read this blog for a while one could make the assumption that everything wasn’t sunshine and daffodils. I won’t go until the full story because that would be another month of blog posts, and it really wouldn’t be worth it. What I can say is that through some rough times my sister and I could not be more opposite from each other.

While I fought for what I that was right, she was someone who wanted to be popular. This was done by dating every boy she could to the point that they (her ex-boyfriend)tried to goad me in a fight by exclaiming what they did in full earshot of everyone. She stole, but also got in to a lot of trouble with drug users and it got to the point where she would play what is now a well honed sympathy act to get as much as she  can out of people with the least amount of work. When you sit down and you see someone with unruly kids who doesn’t give one care when it does not benefit her, well then you have seen my sister.

Well, she owed me for a car I had let her borrow after my parents vouched she was turning over a new leaf. She then went to scrap my car out of spite without paying for it. That cost me about 1,200,and remember that because it will come back later.

In almost a year she has burned through four more cars with another one being on the repo list. When it comes to having her own place she hasn’t been able to hold her own for more then a couple moths at a time being evicted no less then three times before her 25th birthday.

Mom got sick of dealing with her living off of her especially when she doesn’t not try to do anything to help when it doesn’t help her. She also has a habit of trying to ruin anything anyone else has going to be the center of attention. All this was happening while I was living with my own apartment for the something like 8th year which after all that time living on my own my health started to drop. Which is where I am now I have to live with family because of my health problems and my sister wants me to forgive the debt if she pays for my first month rent so I can sign the lease for her to live there.

Safe to say since I cannot trust her I will not live with her.


Ficlet for Stella Glow

First Drink

Alto x Lisette

Alto was tired. He had to find her. Lisette had said she was going to the party at Kadaj’s bar. The night sky was clear over Regnant save for a couple wisps of clouds while the remaining citizens partied. Walking from the barracks it was only a couple blocks before some familiar figures were working their way back. Dante and Hilda were helping Lisette walk while Sakuya was being helped by Nonoka and Rusty. Getting closer it was clear what the problem was because the smell of liquor was strong on everyone.

Drinking at the bar was not the best idea in hindsight, and many of the citizens wanted to show their thanks by buying drinks for the heroes. Rusty had plenty of drinking experience as did Nonoka as part of her training. Hilda had been a queen for so long that she had mastered the form of not letting drink get the better of her. Dante just had a high tolerance which left both witches to getting blitzed with no defenses. Looking at Dante it seemed Hilda was telling him something that Alto could not catch. Finally getting to them it was Hilda that asked him to take Lisette to her room. More ordered then asked Sakuya muttered about feeling ill before the group waved their goodbye ferrying off to a spot out of sight leaving the water witch leaning on him.

“Alto, why are you here?” She giggled.

“I wanted to talk to you Lisette although it may have to wait until tomorrow. Let’s get you home.”

Giggling at the conductor it was the remaining group watching from a dark alley that made sure they were hiding back to the barracks.

“Why did I have to get drunk. I feel horrible.”

“Because Lisette wants to be respectful of their relationship and not push so if we had drink with her. He would begin to get suspicious. We need to have an innocent reason and…”

“To do that we need to misdirect attention so that out true motives, getting the idiots to open up can be finished.”

Nonoka listened from Hilda and Dante while Rusty leaned against the wall nodding silently.

“Woow that’s amazing Hilda.” Nonoka chirped while rubbing the fire priestesses back. Sakuya was currently retching over the back alley. Everything was set now it was up to the inebriated water witch to push the conductor.

Both were currently making their way back to the barracks as best they could while Lisette made comments on whatever was on her mind. Getting past the wooden double doors with the help of the guard. Traversing the hallways something had gotten it in her mind to sleep together, and as tempting as that would sound she was in no form for such activities. Fidgeting as they passed his door she pulled hard left from his shoulder throwing both into a stumble while she laughed. Thinking about his position before agreeing he could at least keep an eye on her in his room, and they had slept together before back in the village on cold nights. Closing the door it was easier pulling her up into his arms before making their way to the bed then her trying to put her legs back under her. Sensing their destination she pulled his head down to lay a smoldering kiss on him that made him recollect himself for a moment afterward. Rolling over her he was soon pulled in to a flail of arms until they found harbor at her thighs. Laughing at his inexperience the alcohol was making her much bolder.

“Am I be-utiful, Alto?

Snuggling up to her he would always show it before saying it.

“Then why don’t you show me, it doesn’t hurt to let me know sometimes.”

Feeling his hands begin to roam got her self-conscious. She could not completely understand what was going on, but somewhere it was all registering as everything seemed to stop. He was whispering in her ear the breath tickling the top while his hand rested on her lower back before coming up, around to her hands. She could feel a line of fire that didn’t feel so bad, it was a very good feeling but she could barely stand the heat made her insides hum with something new. Jerking forward she had to feel more of him pulling the buttons away soon she had to feel more of him. Pulling the buttons away soon she was resting her head against his bare chest while she panted from the feeling building up.

She couldn’t understand why this was happening. Somewhere undefined in her mind she did want it whatever it was. Alto, ever the responsible, couldn’t really stop her and all the same couldn’t push her either.

“Let’s go to sleep. If we were to do anything I would hope you would remember it.”

Blushing at his comment both agreed laying down next to him. He pulled the covers over them she snuggled closer mumbling how it could be tomorrow night. The water witch was first to awake to two pairs of bright eyes belonging to the younger witches.

“Lisette, why are you on top of Alto?”

“They are doing the things Rusty was talking about….dirty things.” The earth witch explained.

“Wahhh. Alto! How did we get here?”

“You got drunk and wanted to goof around and instead you went to sleep.” Mumbling from his position used to extra people in his room.

“So not dirty… mor.”

“Nope, I guess we should leave them alone, come on Mordi!”

Watching both leave her body was trying to hide behind him with only her arm wrapping around his chest.

“I’m so embarrassed Alto.”

“I’m not, now that you’re a little more coherent let’s go over what you wanted last night.”